To The Disgruntled Fans of The 1984 Ghostbusters

To The Disgruntled Fans of The 1984 Ghostbusters

 They aren’t making this movie for you:

Sony doesn’t actually want your money. They got your money already. They don’t care that you don’t like the idea of this movie. Out of touch white men in their late 30’s-40’s may as well be bloated, penniless corpses to Hollywood.

You don’t go to movies like you used to:

Because you’re old. And your back hurts. And teenagers will straight up snapchat a whole movie, and the light from their screens is kryptonite to Olds like you and me. You’d rather marathon some  “cool” cartoon to try and recapture the warm, gooey feeling of your bygone youth.

And you complain about movies when you do go see them (also, when you don’t,) But you know who will like this one? Who will see this in droves? Teenagers and women and the country of China, to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars.

So go watch Deadpool again and tell everyone how awesome it is and get off this movie’s hump.

Yes, it’s a cash grab.

Like every other adaptation, sequel, prequel and reboot that you lap up. Do you think they made Fast 7 because there was still some character depth to plumb? This has nothing to do with an attack on your precious childhood and everything to do with you no longer feeling represented and catered to in a world that for so long bent over backwards to appeal to you. Guess what Old, you’re irrelevant, and no one but your reddit friends care what you think about a movie that has nothing to do with you.

Captain America: Civil War

Captain America: Civil War

First:

I want to say that I am in awe of what Joss Whedon has contributed to television, film, and my life (not only am I a writer because of Buffy The Vampire Slayer BUT I was by the power of Warner Brothers deemed The Official Buffy Watcher. No. Seriously.)

However:

After watching the INCREDIBLE balancing act that Markus, McFeely, and the Russo Brothers pulled off in Civil War… The dozen character’s distinct voices, nuances, motivations… well, in retrospect it made a solid movie like Age of Ultron seem like “Seven Joss Whedons must battle a formidable Joss Whedon and his army of mechanical Whedons.”